How to Talk to Your Spouse About Mediation
Discussing divorce or custody mediation with your spouse or co-parent can be challenging, especially during times of conflict. Even though mediation is the optimal choice for families, having the initial conversation may be difficult.
Where to begin? Before initiating the discussion, it is helpful to prepare yourself for the conversation about mediation. First, gather the information you need to show your partner that a peaceful, affordable path is the best option for your family. If one spouse is particularly cost-conscious, emphasizing the financial advantages of mediation over court proceedings may resonate with them. If one spouse is fearful about the trauma of divorce, point out that in mediation, decisions about your property, debts, and children are made together, not by a judge,
Keep it simple. The conversation can be simple. Explain that it is important to maintain financial stability and well-being. Avoiding a court battle will be beneficial for everyone. Sharing resources, like articles or my blog, can also help facilitate understanding.
Use a script: Having a structured approach can ease the conversation. For instance, you might say:
“I’ve been thinking about how we can move forward in a way that’s best for both of us and the children. I came across mediation, which is a process where a neutral third-party attorney-mediator helps us reach agreements amicably. It’s known to be affordable, confidential, and efficient. Would you be open to exploring this option together?”
Here is a sample script you can use to have the initial conversation:
Be Patient: If your spouse does not respond positively immediately, give them time. They may need to conduct their own research about mediation or process the idea. Pressuring your partner can be counterproductive –instead, allow them the time and space to come to their own conclusions. Usually, they will see the benefits and decide mediation is the best option.
Highlight the Benefits. Emphasize the advantages of mediation using the acronym ACE:
- Affordable: Mediation is much less expensive than court proceedings.
- Confidential: The process is private, keeping personal matters out of the public eye.
- Efficient: Cases can be resolved more quickly than through traditional legal channels.
Give your partner time. Introducing the idea of mediation is a significant step. Allow your partner the necessary time to consider this option without feeling rushed. A thoughtful approach can lead to a more amicable agreement.
Schedule a Consultation: Consider scheduling a consultation with a mediator. This meeting can provide further clarity on the process and address any questions or concerns. Click here to schedule a consultation:
The information provided on this website does not, and is not intended to, constitute legal advice; instead, all information, content, and materials available on this site are for general informational purposes only.